Day 1: Challenge accepted
I’ve been thinking about trying something new recently, something to keep me feeling fresh and invigorated. Something to keep challenging my way of thinking.
I always find it a bit bit harder to stay positive in winter - I think that’s why I love Christmas so much. That thing about it being the light in the darkness of winter, you know? Yeah I really need that. It’s not all about the Baileys.
Have you seen people tagging #365daysofhappiness? Or #365daysofgratitude? Or there are loads of different ones to choose from. But basically they’re about taking a moment every day to focus on the good. That every day you can think of one thing, no matter how small, that’s good and pure and happy.
I like the the idea of those challenges. That you can train your brain to be positive. I think I need that. I think actually I’ve been going through that process since I started therapy after my sister died. Man that’s a long process.
Well here’s something I think I can do to maybe speed things up a little. Or keep focussed on the journey anyway. 365 days of writing about the good things. One entry every day where I write about whatever good things I can about that day.
One day I’d like to get to a point when I know I’ll always have a core part of me that’s warm and secure about the love in me - for and from others. I’m so much better now than I’ve ever been I think. But there’s still a way to go.
I still have to get to get to that place where I control my happiness. Where I know my value and I’m not rocked by other people’s opinions. It’s coming, I can feel it. But it still needs a little help on the way.
Here’s hoping this does some of the job. And that I can actually stick to doing something every day for a year. Yikes a whole year!
Today my boy told me he loves me so much. And not just because I’m his Mum. Oh no, apparently I’m adorable.
There are times when I worry about when my children will stop loving me so much. When the disdain and embarrassment overwhelms them and the thought of hanging out with Mum is just too awful and I’ll be left alone on the sofa with just the memories of cuddles and kisses.
I don’t know why I do this to myself. My children, both of them equally, are very demonstrative in their love for me. They both want to hold my hand when we walk anywhere. They both want cuddles in the evening. They both want me to kiss them goodnight.
Maybe the time will come when one or both can’t show their love for me. Perhaps we’ll fight and argue and therell be tears and tantrums. But that’s not today. Today we love each other so much we have to squeeze each other tight and tell each other how adorable we are.
Today is a a good day.